Thursday, September 17, 2009

God Loves Fun

When you buy milk you only chill it after you open it.  I keep opening my cupboard in the kitchen and staring at the large juicebox-like 'thing' of milk and quelling my urge to QUICK STICK IT IN THE FRIDGE.  Just doing my part to adapt culturally.  It makes sense, on a very technical level.  Milk is warm in a cow.  Milk is in a sealed container.  After you break the seal, germies get in, and so then it must be cooled.   Space also makes sense on a technical level, according to some people.  And also having children, to others.  Computers too.  

I will keep my focus on milk.  

(No seriously, just sit down some time and try to process exactly how the frick a computer works.  Or recorded sound.  Whatttt.  Whattttttttttt.  Whaaaaa... t)

Today Kris and I went to Trippydoobie.  Tittyboobie.  Abu Dhabi.  

There is an amusement park on top of a mountain and it is called Tribidabo.  I find it impossible to remember the name.  Also on top of the mountain is a cathedral.  

What??  Why?? 

A religiously fun experience?  God Loves Fun Too?  A way to harvest the prayer-power in all the "oh my gaaaaaaaaaaaaaawd!!!!"s of rollercoaster riders?  

Who made this.  Who.  

Additionally.  ADDITIONALLY.  The only way up to the amusement park is a "tram car" aka lurching old train-thing that climbs a hill so steep making sounds so foreboding that you are certain your intention to journey to fun, popcorn, + spiritual cleansing will only actually be replaced by sudden lurching death.  If you are the type who is drawn to the mountaintop by ferris wheels and other non-acrophobic pleasures, ok, fair.  Maybe this is part of the experience.  

Why would anyone go to church here.  (It costs 4 Euro to get up and back, too)

Why would anyone build a giant catherdral in a purposely inaccessible place.  A place that already host an amusement park.  I'm pretty sure that as a way to compete with Gaudi, this is a fail.  

Once we got up there, all the rides were closed.  




Look at this amusement park!  Woooooooo!  Fun, huh?  Look, it is up here on this mountain overlooking the entire city, so you can see it allllllll the time and just wish to go.  And then if you DO succumb to temptation, and venture up the mountain, we will bring you up in terrifying metal boxcar and make you fear your life.  Once you are on the top, TRICK SUCKAAAAAA all the rides are fake.  And you know you are not getting back in that boxcar.  What else can you DO on this mountaintop?   


A-ha.  Ahhhh haaaaaaaa.

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